I love watching loud, raunchy, aggressive sex.

The kind of sex where the “top” takes control both physically and verbally. Sometimes it’s an attitude of confidence or even cockiness, with the “top” barking orders like, “Yeah, swallow that dick!” or “You gonna give me some of that ass?!?” or “Take that dick!” Other times, it’s more intense and aggressive, verbal taunting like “Get on your knees and suck this motherfuckin’ dick!” or “Yeah, choke on that dick!” or “Damn, you takin’ that dick like a bitch!” etc. etc.

The kind of sex where the “bottom” gasps and winces and groans….not with girlish squeals of ecstasy, but masculine grunts of resistance and endurance, pain mingled with pleasure, and maybe even a bit of humiliation about the fact that his ASS is being enjoyed by another man. Ass is sure as hell not pussy, and when a man gets fucked in his ass, it’s a very different kind of experience from a woman enjoying vaginal intercourse. For me, it’s the fact that there’s something difficult and “unnatural” about a man’s asshole being penetrated that makes it so hot to watch. That’s probably why I’m so turned on by watching inexperienced “tops” take dick….the pained facial expressions, the muscles tightened defensively, the squirming discomfort with occasional flashes of reluctant pleasure….all of that depicts a kind of conquest, the surrendering of one man’s body to another, that is intensely arousing to watch.

Rough, verbal sex almost always makes for hotter porn, in my opinion. Isn’t porn ultimately about the art of exaggeration, taking our fantasies and fetishes and making them almost ridiculously explicit and larger than life? So it’s no wonder that the best porn usually involves a little bit of aggression and “dirty talk.”

That brings me to my biggest disappointment with my own videos so far: the fact that they’re so damn QUIET!

I’ve been recognizing this as a weakness in my videos for awhile now, and a couple of you have brought it up lately, so I figured it was as good a time as any to discuss it on the blog. In all of my videos, I think there are plenty of arousing visuals and memorable action. Even the natural sounds of dick-sucking, ball-slurping, butt-licking, and ass-fucking can be a real turn-on. But I’ll be the first to admit that my videos lack the kind of aggressive edge and verbal exchanges I’d prefer!

Part of this can’t be helped, I’m afraid. At least not until I find some places other than my apartment where I can film. There are coffee-shops and restaurants right next to where I live, which means I have very little privacy because people are almost always around (if you’ve watched any of my videos, you’ve probably already heard the sounds of people laughing, dogs barking, children playing, etc. in the background). Plus, I have a neighbor living in an apartment right next to me, and the walls in my apartment building are frustratingly thin. So sadly, rough and verbal sex isn’t much of an option for me until I find some other places to shoot.

Still, I know things could be at least a LITTLE more energetic than they’ve been so far. It seems like the guys I’ve worked with so far just aren’t the aggressive or verbal types. As a couple of you have already pointed out, part of this is no doubt due to the fact that all of the guys I’ve worked with have never done anything like this before, so they’re understandably going to be a little nervous and inhibited throughout their first video-shoots. Most of the guys I’ve worked with so far also tend to be quiet, laid-back types, and when they have sex it’s just naturally quiet and laid-back like their personalities.

I’m no exception. I can get a little dominant physically sometimes….grabbing a guy’s head while he’s sucking my dick, smacking my hard dick against his face, fairly standard stuff like that….but I’ve never done a very good job at being verbally dominant. I basically have two expressions that I use on a regular basis: “Ahhh, that feels good!”….and “You like that?!?” Even with those rather corny and mild expressions, I usually feel ridiculous when I hear the words come out of my mouth!

Shyne likes to tease me about this, and tells me that I need to come up with some “new material.” Not that he has any room to talk, considering the fact that he’s almost comically quiet during his scenes, even when he’s obviously enjoying himself.

And that brings up another issue. My basic porn philosophy as an amateur producer has been to let the guys be themselves and just film whatever happens with little to no coaching or interference from me. The sex might be mediocre, it might be awful, and maybe, just maybe, it will be sizzling-hot….but whatever happens, it will be REAL.

But lately I’ve begun to realize that a little more “directing” from me might be necessary, especially when working with shy, nervous, and/or sexually inexperienced models. Still, I worry that too much coaching from me might cross the line between authentic amateur porn and phony, exaggerated “acting.”

Like many of you, I’d like to see things get a little more intense and dirty and verbal in future videos. I will strive to direct the action a little more, without spoiling its spontaneity and authenticity. As I evolve as a producer/director, I will also continue to evolve as a performer, hopefully growing more confident and creative and daring in future videos. Plus, I will continue finding new models, and I’m sure some of them will be more naturally wild and outgoing and aggressive in the bedroom than the guys I’ve featured so far.

Trust me, I’m my own worst critic, and things will only get hotter from here….